Literalism- The Problem With Twin Flame Theory

‘The opposing principles of sun and moon, drawing near over receding waters, with the symbols for sulphur and mercury in close association. If the alchemist is successful in fusion of the oppositions, of male and female, represented by the philosophical androgyne.’

• The Secret Teachings of all Ages by Manly P. Hall

The human search for their ‘other half’ is a tale as old as time. We see this theme emerge consistently in the stories we tell. But, like so many other myths and parables… I wonder if we have wondered too far into literalism with the concept of soul mates. Nothing conveys the hyperbolic and literal interpretation of this myth better than the popular ‘twin flame theory’. 

The concept of a ‘divine masculine’ and a ‘divine feminine’ housed in two seperate bodies, destined to unite for the good of mankind plays out beautifully in storytelling… but time and time again… it has painful and disastrous consequences when reenacted in the real world. 

I feel the reality of twin flames lives in one of Carl Jung’s most iconic quotes; ‘Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.’

To chase or run from the love of another person, is to dream. To find the ‘missing half’ within oneself is to awaken. 

All of us have our own free will. We each follow unique paths in this lifetime. We can even chose to leave the familiar road at any time. Even if we are destined to meet a soul mate, this person can leave… they can avoid karma…  they can shun destiny… or they can simply change their mind as well as their feelings. This is a painful reality of the human experience. 

Maybe there is a better way to feel whole. Maybe the stories we tell and the art we create are getting at another point. One we keep missing.

Occult is derived from the Latin word ‘occultus’ which translates to “knowledge of the hidden”.  Finding our inner truth and knowing our true self is really what is at the heart of many occult practices.  This quest is the most exquisitely shown in alchemy. Over and over again we see the theme of the sun and the moon, the king and the queen.  The masculine and feminine are either portrayed as separate pieces coming together as one, or independently existing in perfect balance. 

At the very begging of this article, I used a quote from Manly P. Hall concerning the alchemical marriage and the philosophical androgyny it produces. We are now at the point in human history that science and psychology are just starting to catch up with what the alchemists already knew. They call this phenomenon ‘psychological androgyny’. 

‘Psychological androgyny is a much wider concept, referring to a person’s ability to be at the same time aggressive and nurturant, sensitive and rigid, dominant and submissive, regardless of gender. A psychologically androgynous person in effect doubles his or her repertoire of responses and can interact with the world in terms of a much richer and varied spectrum of opportunities. It is not surprising that creative individuals are more likely to have not only the strengths of their own gender but those of the other one, too.’

• Creativity: Flow and the Psychology of Discovery and Invention by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi

As you can see… psychology is beginning to recognise the immeasurable benefits of living with a united or balanced masculine and feminine. The imbalance we see in ourselves is reflected in our society, and vice versa. Our growing up in patriarchal systems which enforce rigid binaries have made us feel as though we are only ‘half’… and it’s because in some ways we are….

I do believe other halves which are either masculine or feminine presenting will cross our path to teach us how to embody this opposite energy within ourselves. They might leave, or they might remain in our lives until death. But… we are never dependent on them. We do not need them to individuate.  They are our teachers, not the other part of ourselves… that other part is already within us. The trick is learning how to bring it to consciousness and embody It.  

It is up to us alone to unite the inner opposites and become whole.